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Feelings..Cicak on the Ceiling ;D

Today is indeed such a tiring day.Okay,I admit now,I am a last minute person.I study last minute and I die after the exam weeks.

Today I died. :) I didn't plan to go to church because I knew my duties is excused this week to teach History.I planned to just die studying at home.But my mom managed to nag me off the bed.I was crying in the car because I was so worried I cannot study in church.

I went for the main service and I was so disgustingly doing my maths in the sanctuary then later went to mamak to continue.

Yes,I have not gone to my main topic yet.I saw him today after all the nuisance I did after drinking a cup of ice coffee in the mamak stall.I saw him after my worship session.Life is just tough for me.But good thing for me,I walk pass all the loopholes of acting perfectly normal. :) Claps for me!!~~

I know its really bad to act perfectly fine when you're not but I have no choice.I cannot be unhappy forever.Its true,it takes time for everything to get better.I believe it will get better.Life isn't that mean to me after all :)

I smiled,I rolled on the floor,I made everyone laugh but myself. :) keekkeek just kidding,I laughed too!

But there is just something about that boy that holds me still.That honest and simple feeling that I cannot explain how much I adore.I wish I was like that :P

Honest fact: I feel so lonely now a days...I feel lifeless and dying.I have no reason to be looking anywhere else but my books.I also have no reason to have a boyfriend because now I look so ugly and lifeless.I am not taking care of my weight and I am eating like a mad pig.I also have no reason to be thinking of a young boy because I am such a pedophile already and I dont need to be an extra pedobear.

I should just stop talking..

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