Why?

I always wonder, what plan does God have for me? What kind of life does God have in mind for me to live? The character that I have are often known as stupid, dumb, weak and whatever you can think of that is negative. I can see my positive traits on myself but I don't see people around me noticing it. It hurts me very very much because my family including my parents consider my character as a negative trait. 

Unlike my sisters, I do not like to yell, offend or make a big fuss over matters. I don't feel that all these ways solving a matter is healthy but to my family, I am considered weak, stupid and very often being stepped on the head. Or maybe a more generic way of saying, I am mentally slower than the rest of my sisters. Sometimes even I myself get confused with what they say. I actually believe what they say and agree that I am mentally slower compared to the rest of them. I am always not as good as they are. They are apparently at all times and all ways better than me. 

But admitting something that I am not hurts me so bad. It is like when a teacher accuses you of cheating in an exam and she doesn't give you the opportunity to explain why. All she does is brand you the way you are. Yes, that is how it feels and for the last thing I remember I hate it very much when someone accuses me of something I am not. Commonly, they often make me feel that I am never good enough. Apparently I do not sing well enough, I do not learn well enough, I am not able to take care of myself and everything else that I wish does not matter to me.

So what plan does God have for me? I understand I am uniquely sensitive to my surroundings and I am constantly trying to overcome my feelings of being sensitive but why? Why does it have to feel like this? How come my heart and mind does not always allow me to speak out words to hurt people even when I try?Why am I so conscious of how people would feel?Why do people not care about my feelings? 

Haiz.. -.-