Mind Blogger

So, 2016 just arrived about an hour ago. I celebrated my last day of 2015 with my family in church as usual except this twist. He is not there. I remember that day when I sent him off, I was pretty sure that I would have broken down if it wasn't for that will to have that power to stand strong simply because I want him to leave without any burden. I stood there and watched him leave. I couldn't move another inch because I was so afraid I would forget that I want him happy there. I was so afraid that I would accidentally shed a tear and make him feel heavy to go too. 2015 passed just like any other year. Except it was so different without him. Everywhere I went, memories of him would flood my mind. Holding back my tears I try my utmost best to find ways to curb that. I thought 'Hey, you've been through this separation bullshit. It shouldn't hurt you'. Well, pretty obviously I was wrong. They say writing is when the heart learns to heal. It is when you r...

Many times while I was growing up I notice myself falling for the fancy the guy. Those who make you nervous, excited and happy. Their action and reaction makes you look so stupid but yet you are so thrilled to be with them. Yes teenage girls, I'm talking about that guy you stared at during classes regardless of the venue. :) That one you stalk every status updated, his last seen on whatsapp, and favourite every tweet he tweets. Yea that one.  Truth is, that is a great experience and no point following what the others advise you not to. It is your life and therefore you should go and experience the heartbreak, the tears and the fear of falling in love again. Only then you will learn how to grow up and open your eyes before you make another decision in life to commit to someone. Only then you will learn the true value of choosing the right person to commit to.  Yeah, I get that people rather hear the danger before they experience it but truth is, even if you know everythi...

Wassuppppppppp Its been a while isn't it? But hey guess what, I have decided to do a lot more. I actually have a lot more ideas in my head to touch on. First things first, I have been really good. I started my second semester of my degree in Accounting and Finance. Still no scholarship, still here and looking at life at very positive angle. Today, Hoong took me out for a date. Honestly, its one of the best dates I've had with him in a while. I have the fondest memory of us having a picnic together and then today its just carefree us having lunch with smiles and laughter. :) First, we went to DubuYo for lunch. Because there was a very sweet lady in his work place who gave him some voucher, we were able to eat good food at an affordable price. Okay, I actually don't even know what it means to be affordable anymore. Every damn thing is expensive! Then, I suggested we participate in some small games in the center hall to try to get some MTV Worldstage tickets. ...

Hellooooo, Its almost a month I've started my degree. Okay, overall comments I'd say its alright. Its hard to be normal again when you've had such a crazy bunch of people from Foundation in Business and Information Technology of INTI KL. Its hard, so hard like a rock candy. Hahah jks. During this period of settling in so many things happened around me. First was getting to know that one of my old friend was caught in an unnecessary drama with someone else's girlfriend. Sad thing is that I know that I can't do anything to make things less difficult for him. And I care for him and I know that he is not telling me the truth. So, how can I help when he doesn't even want me to? And I can see it. I can feel it happening. I'm hurt seeing that happen but it is his choice and he chose to be with the wrong person at the wrong time. He wanted it, so I'm just going to stand there and watch this with a heavy heart. Maybe he really need to go through something so ...

Hey hey hey.... :D Spend my whole day cleaning up my room, watching movies and thinking. Yes, I multitask and I'll give you a bonus, I didn't really sleep the night before. Simply because I am worried and a little afraid of moving forward. Standing at this position right now, I am beginning my degree this coming Monday. I still have the stand to move over to Hertfordshire to finish my last year but the best part is that financially things have not been settled in for that one year in that foreign land. However, financially it is almost ready, set and running for complete local studies. I'm really afraid. Watching myself grow up day by day physically but mentally I am still quite unwilling to move forward. I spent my whole day spring cleaning my room today just to sort things out, manage my mind and get myself ready for 3 years of patience. 3 years is not too long but not short either and I am so afraid I will screw things up. In my mind, I keep asking myself if I am...

Hey all, I've been away I know but I cannot sleep so, I was thinking I could spend some time evaluating myself because at the end of the day writing really does help a person grow. I've been dating the same guy for approximately 1 year and 2 months. I love him very much and I know I am in love with him because of the way I am feeling right now. Loving someone is so hard. I don't deny. There's a phase where I only cared about myself. Then there's a phase where I cared so much about him and finally there's another phase where I can't bear to even stop thinking about him. Staring at my phone every single time is bad because I am waiting and waiting for a reply. Each time I wait I am in fear because those waiting seemed so familiar. Okay forget about it. Let's just focus on the part where I don't like waiting. Because in that duration of waiting, you feel less important and less of a priority. It hurts you very much because you know there is no...

What defines a leader? Many times in our lives we hear people openly say they are great leaders and they are right. Because there are two types of leaders as at today that I have seen, followed and been one. The first type of leader are leaders of themselves. They lead themselves very well and intends to lead others lives as well. They take up challenges and expects the people around him to function exactly the same way. Now the catch is, these leaders do not tolerate failures. Truth be told, these leaders are not the best leaders because they are so caught up in their own leadership, they forget about the one biggest problem in every plan that leaders face. It is the fact that humans were never made perfect. Now the second type of leaders are leader that empowers. These leaders are great leaders of themselves but they have already established the fact that humans are imperfect. Hence, they look forward to leadership that empowers their team. They are not afraid to show others ...

Oheyoooo I have just completed my pre - university program. I took my last paper last Wednesday and I am proud to say, I did good. I am happy because I tried my very best to do what I think I can. Believe me, you can do more than you actually think you could. I did Foundation in Business and Information Technology.I was running into the business field simply because I am very passionate about money. (Hahahaha aren't we all?) Now I'm not going to lie. It was not easy for me to find myself an aim to where I want to go to. I was lost. Just like everyone else, I lost my way the moment when I faced so much negativity from everyone. I wanted to do medicine so badly but financial difficulty was one of the biggest challenges I faced. The best part was that I didn't do that great in my SPM. I was down. I felt so depressed. Then I picked up an education in business because I want to challenge the one thing that brings me down. I still remember I spent my first semester just h...

Not my first time blogging about my oh so fabulous life. Haha I've been blogging for about 7 years. Yeah I've made so many mistakes along the way. So many till when I look back I feel more stupid than I ever was. Took me a long way to find the true meaning of priority. However, as many mistakes I've made, I found myself making one of the many right decisions I've made. And that is the decision to be in love with this young man here. :) I was hurt and I am not going to lie, I was skeptical about the lifespan of relationships till I probably have given up hope that I could ever love another person again. How long is long for a relationship to be solid and not volatile? A day? A month or a year? Furthermore, aren't men so difficult to understand? You don't know when they're in love and when they aren't. Now now, Let me tell you the love story of two best friends who fell in love with each other. Both of us belong to this one whole bunch of best...

Bye 2014 Hello 2015 :) It has been such a great year last year. I mean 2014.. :) I know I know, I'm late since it is 11 days passed new year but hey at least I make an effort. 2014 has been wonderful because... 1. I finally realise that love does not always come from someone else. Love can come from yourself and also from God. After all, He has been the one who loved us so much that he was willing to give his son away for us. You have to learn to love yourself before you go out there to be loved. 2.  After realizing that, I found love in a hopeless place. :) I fell in love with my best friend.  I knew him from the day I stepped into that tuition centre. Timid, quiet and totally unbelievable because he is so quiet. -.- We have been really close since I came back from PJ. Didn't think it was possible because in everything we are completely different. But love came our way. :)  3. Then I got my first job, learning how to be a grown up. It was really ...